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Some Fun in and with Chemistry, the Elements, and Atoms

...so this neutron walks into a bar and asks how much it will cost him for a drink. the bartender replies, "for you, no charge".
        - thanks to Carol for this quicky

More challenges that you seem to like so well!

But first, take a look at a sophisticated but sad periodic table (that will make you laugh).

Rush P.Hoops =
U.F.McNair =
Ned M.Bolumy =
Dan Music =
Nathan Lum =
Megan Muir =

Riddle 1
An active sailor, yet seldom free,
An old salt, Peter, afire in the sea,
Near noble, yet base and prone to lie,
Purple with rage when excited am I.

Riddle 2
Shunned by most and craved by all,
Food for rabbits, yet made from straw,
Billions found greed and abandoned sense,
Though not a fool, I am quite dense.

Aren't they a kick! Thanks again to Doris Eckey!
How about YOU getting on the stick and trying your hand at making up some simpler ones?

See if you can make up more anagrams, make us laugh or provide another 'elementary' challenge.
Send your stuff, please, to: FUN.